December 2011
214 posts
im so happy i have a wedding to go to tonight so i dont have to worry about trying to make fake new years eve plans
nsect:
bughug:
i made a fucking 78 frame gif under 500kb and tumblr isnt letting me upload it WTF
calm down cum rag
“you just dont get me” i yell at my mom. she says “how could you…prefer that!?…” she looks disgusted at me. “i didnt raise you like that” she adds. i reply “im sorry mommy i really am but i cant help it. this is who i am”. she picks up my suitcase and sets it outside “any child who prefers special victims unit to criminal intent is...
Anonymous asked: how did you get multiple images as your header(s)??
i was watching a really good episode of law and order and someone tried 2 ruin it by sending me a link of them singing like fuck this night
it bugs me when i see people i follow talking to people i hate then i realize that i hate someone on the internet ive never met before and i think thats really funny
my sister: its not healthy to eat cheesecake before bed…
my favorite after christmas tradition is going through my wishlist buying everything i didnt get off my moms credit card without her knowing. merry christmas bitch
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if you wanna make yourself really unattractive to me on okcupid put a picture of you outside or doing anything physical
when my mom lifts up her shirt im like “eww i dont want to see those.” then shes like “theyre not even real boobs! theyre made by doctors. please chris look at them” then i do and say “yeah theyre nice” and she walks away. its happened like 4 times already and she’s only been home for like 2 hours
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my mom had her second breast cancer reconstruction surgery 2day so her boobs are back to normal kinda and she keeps walking into my bedroom pulling up her shirt saying “look at them”
minniemouseclubhouse:
jocontrol:
minniemouseclubhouse:
this is the peak of your life. do you ever think about that. it’s all downhill from here, guys. these are your glory days.
i think about it all the time i think i’m actually going to peak somewhere between 22 and 25 though
i have that feeling too. i hope it’s the case.
i think about that all the time too. these are supposed to be...
are you serious dad!?
1 tag
burgerrr replied to your photo
remember when she was on SVU
yeah and kissed olivia that was scandalous i think about it all the time
santa hats gone and im sad
I’m really good at
Sex, hiking, cooking, talking, swimming, hunting, taking carE of kids, training animals, cuddleing, and being lazey
being lazey omg thats so cute like a little handicap dog with missing legs u just want to sit on ur lap
you have to watch that video like 4 times im doing one of those toddler crying fits where they jsut cant catch their breath and the parents get scared thats me right now
happy holidays is for terrorists
its merry christmas
destroyman:
i need a boyfriend, and i dont even care if hes not scene
this is the tag line for “a boyfriend for christmas”
my sister just got in/faked a car accident to get out of church damn shes smart
im gonna have to go to chirstmas chuch while all u filthy sinners are on tumblr or probably eatting or something this isnt fair
at a nice restaurant
server: and our special dessert today is creme brulee garnished with sweet cherry sauce --
me: let me stop you right there
me: do you guys have starburst
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5 tags
qq8qqq:
we invited a black girl to my purity ball just to watch her burst into flames when she enters the church
omg im embarrassed that everyone knows that i eat 2lb containers of hummus now